The gratitude project - 2 January 2012

As a kid I always loved the fig trees at New Farm park - we would climb in them for hours. The park now has a playground that weaves in and around the trees. I can't wait until Isaac is old enough for us to climb the trees together.

The gratitude project - 1 January 2012

A dear friend of mine is starting her gratitude project - taking a photo each day of what she is grateful for. I think this is such a great idea - to reflect each day on what makes us laugh, inspires us and makes us feel special. Little things and big things.

My photo today reflects the new year and the limitless possibilities of a blank canvas. A whole new year, to live and laugh in.

Adventures in Kiddieland

One of the lovely things about parenting is the liberty it allows you to do all manner of childish things.

Over the last fee weekends I have ice skated, crawled through tunnels at lollipops playland, laughed and cried at Disney movies, riden in a real olden day steam train, rushed around with a towel over my shoulders pretending to be a friendly dragon, played numerous games of chasey, hooned around the verandah on Scooter designed for a two year and blown bubbles into the wind.

There are so many amazing things to do with kids in and around Brisbane.

The steam train ride is part of qld rails steam train Sundays. http://www.theworkshops.qm.qld.gov.au/Events+and+exhibitions/Events+and+Activities/Steam+trains/Steam+train+Sunday

The ice skating was done at the winter festival currenlty in king George square - http://www.winterfestival.com.au/brisbane. I never thought I would be pushing my son around the ice on an outdoor rink in the middle of Brisbane city. But I did and we loved it.

Each library offers it's own versions of rhyme time and the museum, state library, GOMAand art gallery never fail to have the most amazing kids activities free of charge.

Some of the things Isaac loves to do I think are ordinary but through his eyes become extraordinary - a ride on a train or ferry is an adventure within itself. Watching diggers and trucks at building sites is a wonderful way to spend an hour or two. Spotting buses and motor bikes on a car ride leads to squeals of excitement.

This absolute enthusiasm for life is so joyous and contagious. I look forward to each weekend and the new adventures we will embark on together.

Motherhood the Musical

Last night I saw Motherhood the Musical with a dear friend. Girls' nights out (or girls' nights off being more accurate as a mother) are always fun and this one was particular good.

The musical is full of moments mothers will identify with - both hilarious and touching. The central premise is around four neighbourhood friends, the youngest of which is expecting her first child. She is full of glowing naivety which the others set about to redress during her surprise baby shower. The three women are already mothers falling into the stereo types of: recently divorced mum, stay at home mum and career mum. Through a number of songs and sly comments the musical demonstrates the wonderful, the mundane, the exhaustion and the elation of motherhood and realionshops.

My only critisicm of the musical - the mums were highly stereo-typed. The career mum formula fed, the stay at home mum feels underappreciated and belittled at times, the divorced mum comfort eats.

Despite the career mum being the one I should have identified with, my favourite character was the wise cracking stay at home mum, who got all the best lines and songs. The very funny "mummy, mummy,mummy" - an observation about the fact you wait excitedly for your baby to say "mummy" and after that point sometimes wish they hadn't as they consistently whine for you all day. And the beautiful "Daniel's Mum" which highlights the sacrfices one makes as a mum but the absolute joy that comes with being the "star" in your child's life and experiencing things from thier point if view. She also has a genius line in a song about lack of bladder control - "I leak like Julian Assange".

I identified closley with the expectant mum and her mile long list of (as one song put it) s&@$ she doesn't need. I remember clearly the lists of ridiculous items outlined in magazines (who are clearly paid to sell said items). Yet as a first time mum with time and money on your side you fall for this hook, line and sinker.

Motherhood the musical is a great night out for mums and mums to be.

Playing at the 12th Night Theater, Bowen Hills, 24th May - 14th June.

Potty Training

Last weekend, I spent three days "intensively" toilet training Isaac.

There are a number of books that advocate this throw-all-nappies-away-and-learn-over-three day approach. My neighbours, who all have kids slightly older than Isaac, put me on to this method (God bless neighours!) They said it was hard work over the three days but definitely worth it because of the results.

So, after some gentle but definite suggestions from daycare that Isaac was "ready" to be toilet trained, we embarked on this adventure. The method I used suggested that 22 months was the ideal time to train - and if you wait until after 30 months you are in for some hard work. At 29 months, Isaac just squeezed through.

During the week I purchased enough underwear to outfit a small army of two year olds, along with numerous bribes and activities to keep us busy over three, stay at home days. For most people the thought of having to clean soiled underwear and dealing with night-time wetting might be the most daunting part of toilet training. For me it was the thought of three days at home.

On Saturday morning Isaac and I cheerfully threw out all his nappies (though I daresay there must still be a few lurking in the backseat of my car). He eagerly wore his new underpants and was generally quite happy with himself. We missed the first accident.

After this, Nathan and I established some rules about who would be watching Isaac like a hawk. Two more accidents were caught and Isaac placed on the potty to finish up. After that, Isaac got what it was all about and let us know when he needed to use the potty. So far so good - and on the afternoon of the first day! At this point Nathan and I were feeling like parental super-stars. That night Isaac was in underwear (all part of the all-in approach) and to my absolute amazement stayed dry all night. At this point I am not sure if Isaac is some kind of toilet training savant or whether this method is the best kept secret in the parenting world.

Of course, by the second day things got a little wobbly - Isaac wasn't letting us know each and every time he needed to use the potty and any patchy attempts to go to the potty were thinly disguised attempts to gain stickers. It was time to bring out the big guns - a number of small plastic dinosaurs. When Isaac went to the potty after asking to go, a dinosaur was given. Cue many trips to the potty with sole purpose of obtaining more dinosaurs. When I told Isaac that the dinosaurs were now only for when he did something really special - like a poo in the potty or staying dry all night, he considered this for a moment before saying "No, I need a dinosaur before I can do a poo". The second night we woke up wet. The third day Isaac improved immensely and we only had one accident.

The fourth day it was off to daycare in underwear. We picked Isaac up that evening with a bag full of wet clothes. So, not quite toilet trained yet. After a couple more nights, he started to stay dry all night again and we have been on a five night streak. The number of plastic bags filled with pants and undies decreased during the week and over this weekend Isaac has gone to the toilet each and every time. I am really proud of him because we were out and about a lot this weekend and he had to use public loos etc.

All in all, I think the training method has really worked and I would recommend it to any parents - just don't think your child is going to be toilet trained beyond any accidents whatsoever after the three days. If you are interested in a quick toilet training method, check out these resources: http://www.3daypottytraining.com/ , http://www.pottytrainingconcepts.com/ISBN-0977905403.html

Fulfilling Carer / Fulfilling Career

The other day, in that snatched kind of conversation that you only have with other mothers, we were talking about whether it is realistic to have both a truly fulfilling full-time career and a truly fulfilling experience as a mother. In between admonishing our toddlers to share their bikes, move out of the way of other kids coming down the slide, not to scale up the slide, and to eat some fruit along with the gingerbread cookies, we spoke about work and being a mother.

One friend quipped that it was perfectly within reach to have a fulfilling full-time career and still feel herself a fantastic mother - her husband just needed to stay home with their son. When I have suggested that I scale my work down to a few days per week, my husband, who truly does co-parent, says "well, I'd like to do that too." And he has a point - as husbands share the parenting duties, it's only fair that they ask for some of the perks as well.

But it is exhausting to drop Isaac at care, work from 8 - 5, pick up Isaac, get home to frantically make dinner (vegetarian, something a two year old likes to eat and within twenty minutes, thank you very much), put Isaac to bath and bed, catch up on any work that needed to be done but couldn't due to having to leave work at 5pm, fall into bed oneself and repeat. And those are the good days when there is no night waking. Nathan and I share the burden of this routine - one week when he was away for work I literally felt like a robot getting through this on my own and was, as always, amazed by single parents.

This is the price we pay for having it all - there simply isn't time to it all as well as we would like. Isaac is a happy and secure child - very well behaved and only occasionally clingy. His development is on par with his friends and I don't seen any negative behaviors that have emerged as a result of long day care hours. Out of the pair of us - he is doing a-okay!

What I worry about is my own inability to switch off from work mode and into family mode. I find it difficult to compartmentalise and whilst reading Isaac a story, one part of my brain is still solving issues at work. So I feel that Isaac isn't getting the best of me and I am not savoring those precious moments with him. I think this is one of the hardest tricks for parents to learn - to live in those moments with your child.

the things kids say

My last post was a little on the sad side and may have read self indulgent. That wasn't my intention, and many mums have confided that they have felt the same way from time to time. But onto happier things ... Isaac is now two years, three months and his every increasing vocabulary as well as the way he expresses things never fails to amuse me. We have been enjoying a number of Isaac-isms that I wanted to share:

"Happy Birthday" - no one just has a birthday, everyone has a "happy birthday". Used in a sentence - "it's your happy birthday today". Also fond of singing happy birthday whenever candles appear, whether this be due to an actual birthday cake or because we happen to be in a black-out.

"Noisy" - used as both an adjective and a noun. Used in a sentence - "Motor Bike making a noisy"

We recently purchased the movie Madagascar on DVD and Isaac's favourite bit is the "I like to move it" song. In fact, he likes it so much that he when he requests Madagascar to go on he says "I like to move it, move it" and when he wants to watch any other DVD he says "I don't like to move it, move it"

Whenever he sneezes he now says "Bless You Isaac"

We recently went on a camping trip with friends. Two of Isaac's best mates were there, Finley and Finn. When asked whether he like camping, he replied, "I love Finns"

Right now, I think I will never forget these, but I am sure that time will dull my memory and when Isaac is mono-syllabic teenager, I will be glad I recorded the memories.

Cute things, part two (from that ever present way of updating friends about the cute things your kids say - Faceook):

• Isaac is always coming up with gorgeous sayings and my current favourite is "ooh that's a little bit tricky". Used to describe anything he doesn't really want to do - eg. Isaac please eat your peas, "mummy, that's a little bit tricky".
• Watching the Victoria Secret parade on Foxtel and asked Isaac if he thought the ladies were pretty - he said "yes", paused and then said "but I am pretty too."